(A Work of “Instructive” Fiction)
Prologue
1.
Nicolas’ job was a dead-end job. He didn’t like it. Each day he would wake up dreading having to go in. He had had dreams of owning his own business, but he never thought it a real possibility. On several occasions (whenever he would consider the idea) he would say to himself, “It works for others but not for me. Others can have a website, but I can’t.” There was no real reason for him to believe this. Rather, it was a way for him to justify not moving forward on his dreams.
Nevertheless, Nicolas talked himself out of it several times. But fear can only reign as long as it is “allowed” to reign. Each day Fear would whisper in Nicolas’ ear. It would say, “You have no reason to start your own business. You are safe now, so why risk it?”
But there came a day when Nicolas had had enough. He had had enough of waking up dreading going to work. A day came when he was tired of being someone else’s employee. And, so, he started his own business.
2.
Growing up, Nicolas always wanted to sell shaving supplies. His father had taught him to shave when he was fourteen. If he closed his eyes, he could still see his father. He stood next to him. “Son, this is a safety razor. You’ve seen me use it and now you’ll use it, too. Don’t listen to folks who say it’s too ‘old fashioned.’ That’s phooey. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways. But you know what ‘they’ say. They say: ‘to each their own.’
“Now, let me show you how to make a lather. You’ve got several dark hairs comin’ in on your chin that we need to shave.” And his father took out the shave mug and the horse-hair brush and soap puck and showed Nicolas how to whip up the lather just right with warm water; and his father showed him how to load the razor and how to hold the razor and… Nicolas opened his eyes. He had always, since that day, wanted to collect razors and mugs and blades, and so on; and, of course, he wanted to sell them.
But could he? He asked himself that question a lot. He had made his decision, however. These ideas, hitherto ignored, were now given the chance to thrive. He would do it. He would start his own business.
3.
It wasn’t as difficult, he found out, as he had always thought. Of course, there was work, but what dreams don’t require work? He had a dream and a goal. Everything he did was toward these ends. He got the inventory. It was from his little apartment that he set up operations. Start small, he thought. One day I’ll be able to have a storefront, but right now I’ll sell online. And that’s what he did.
All he needed was a computer. He set up his social media accounts. He got all his folders on his laptop organized. Using Photoshop, he created myriad advertisements. The goals he had created were becoming a reality. All he needed was a website. He knew he could have hired someone to build it for him, but he decided to do it himself. He knew that the “pre-built” website hosts, like Wix or WordPress, were good but not great because he wouldn’t be able to customize them the way he needed to; there would be limitations. So, he figured out how to build one himself.
He thought his website was good. It looked good, anyway; and why wouldn’t that be enough? But as the months went by the website traffic was not where it should’ve been. It wasn’t bringing in the business he thought it would. His social media sites were bringing in the bulk of his leads. But it wouldn’t be enough, and he knew it.
4.
One day he got an email. It was a mysterious email, and this is where our little history of Nicolas takes quite a “fantastic” turn. The email was sent from an address that read keeperofthewebsites@theforbiddenwoods.com. We know this sounds odd, and, indeed, it was odd, especially for our Nicolas. The subject read: “Your Website Isn’t Doing What It Should Be Doing. I Can Help.”
Nicolas thought it was spam, but if it was spam why didn’t it go into his junk folder? He read the content of the email, which read succinctly: “Answer this email if you’d like me to help you with your website. I have no name, but you may call me Earl.”
Could he trust such an email? We don’t recommend you trust such emails from such mysterious places, but this is a history of a bygone event. The Keeper of the Websites was a real being that resided once but who has since vanished into a cloud of flowers that was carried on the wind and never seen again. If you ever receive an email from the Keeper of the Websites just know it is a forgery, an absolute forgery! In his day, however, when he still roamed the earth, the Keeper of the Websites (known hereafter as Earl) used his extensive knowledge of coding and websites to help many a bumbling website and website owner. His mission was one of good and honest work.
In any case, Nicolas decided to answer the email, and this is where our story really begins. We present here the emails they sent…let us see what happened to our Nicolas as he wrote to this mysterious Earl…
Chapter 1
Dear Earl,
I am emailing you because I am curious. I am curious because I have never received an email quite like yours in my life; or, if I have, have never taken it seriously, thinking it spam or something. However, I am in a “pickle.” My website, as you said, is not doing what it should. What do you suggest?
Sincerely,
Nicolas
Chapter 2
Dear Nicolas,
I am happy you have responded to my email. To your first point, curiosity is both a great and terrible thing. In this instance, however, I would say that it is in the former category. As to your second point, it was a strange email you received from; and you shan’t ever receive another like it. I am surprised you didn’t make mention of my namelessness. Let me formally introduce myself: I am the Keeper of Websites. I am the Bringer of Online Traffic. I am the salvation of coders worldwide. Of course, I suppose, this is presumptuous? I was formed during the great technology boom of the 1970s when a battery was short circuited within an early computer. You shall never see me.
To your final point, there is much wrong with your website. I shall send a follow-up email with more details. Please be patient.
Sincerely,
Earl
Chapter 3
Dear Earl,
This is all very strange, but I shall be on the lookout for your next email.
Best,
Nicolas
Chapter 4
Dear Nicolas,
I want to first thank you for being patient. I know I have kept you waiting for a week. However, I was doing a full crawl of your website. I looked at every square inch, if you’ll allow me the cliché. I looked at each page. Quite frankly, your site is a mess. It is boring in some places and overly complex in other places. I didn’t know where I was half the time. The color schemes are all off. In a word: it wasn’t good.
I don’t mean to be brutally honest. Being blunt can be abrasive, but I want to be helpful. Let’s take a look at your website one part at a time.
Let’s first look at your domain name. Yours is simply too complicated. Your domain name is “shavingacoutrementsbynicolas.com.” I appreciate the creativity, but it is too much. A complicated domain title will be nigh impossible for folks to find; and, if they do find it, difficult to remember. Think simple.
Here are a few options for you to consider:
Newenglandshave.com; shavingsupplies.com; nicolasshaving.com; etc., etc. You can choose what you like. Perhaps there is something else you like better, which is fine; the trick is to keep it simple so folks can remember it, can find it, and can keep coming back.
Now, let’s talk about your website’s aesthetics. Your homepage is a little sparse. There isn’t much information there. All you have is two buttons: “Home” and “Products.” The page itself doesn’t have much information either. It doesn’t have any information about who you are, which could be very beneficial since, when people have a more “human connection” they are more likely to want to do business with you.
Moreover, there isn’t even a picture of you. Actually, there are no pictures at all on your home page except for a small icon of a safety razor. You need more visuals, more text, and more information. The home page is the first place of your website, most likely, that people will view; so, make it count.
When we do get your site ready to go, we are going to make use of H1 and H2 tags, alt tags on any images you use, for these semantics behind-the-scenes will help search engines (such as Google) find your content and prioritize it; on top of these, these elements will make your copy look good. (I may as well note here that your use of <table> in your html to layout your content (what little there is) is just semantically incorrect! But never fear, it is nothing we can’t fix.)
Moving on:
I went to your products page. It is the antithesis of your home page. Where your home page is simple to the extreme your products page is complicated to the extreme. None of the products are alphabetized…or organized in any fashion that I can see. Some products have descriptions and others do not. There are some products that have pictures and others that do not. Some of the product links are broken.
Organization! That is key! I will clean this page up for you. You want your customers to have a good experience on your website, not a terrible one.
Here are a few other things to keep in mind: keep your website secure, your copy error free (I saw a few typos on your website!), and so on.
I will be having one of my messengers call you to help you reconfigure your website.
Best,
Earl
Chapter 5
Dear Earl,
I wanted to thank you for your help. I don’t mind how blunt you were. It needed to be said. I wasn’t even thinking about the things you mentioned, and your messenger, who called a few days ago, showed me even more things I wasn’t paying attention to (like the color choices I was making). I guess I thought all I needed was a website and as long as it existed, I’d be okay, but how wrong I was!
Now my website is a well-tempered website. It has a few new pages. I decided to add an “About Me” page so that my customers could get to know me. I also added subdivisions to the products page. Instead of everything I sell on one page, I’ve broken it up into categories. For example, “Safety Razors,” “Bowls,” “Brushes,” and so on. This is the organization you mentioned in your previous email and what your messenger brought up as well.
I’ve also changed my domain name to one you mentioned: newenglandshave.com. I am going to do a whole overhaul of my image. I’ll be called New England Shave henceforth. Your messenger designed a new logo for me and everything, and I think it looks really sharp.
The design was revamped. I wouldn’t call it “minimalistic,” but I wouldn’t call it crazy, either. I’d say it is somewhere just north of minimalistic…perhaps I’d call it simple and modern. I have photos of myself, of my products, and a few cool icons of shaving gear strategically placed to compliment the text (no more typos!) I’ve included.
I couldn’t have done this without you and without your messenger, Billy. Billy was a great help. I never got to see him, but I got to hear his voice. In the few days since we revamped my website, I have already gotten more clicks. It can only go up from here. Thank you for your help, Earl.
Regards,
Nicolas.
Chapter 6
Nicolas,
I am glad your website is up to par. I took a look today, and it does look incredibly better. And so now I leave you to your website and to your business. I hope your business continues to grow and prosper in the future. Now, I am going to imbibe some fine port I picked up from an old friend the other day and toast to your health and success!
Sincerely
Earl—The Keeper of Websites
Epilogue
As you have read, Nicolas’ whole business got turned around for the better once his website, and his “image,” got redone properly. Nicolas had entered the twenty-first century. With the holiday season upon him, the revamp did him wonders. With so many folks buying gifts for loved ones, he saw an increase in sales (especially since Billy also helped with advertising consulting and how to create a “promo”).
Sometimes Nicolas thinks about who Earl really was. Was he real? (We think he was.) Was he a figment of his imagination? Was he Santa Claus himself!? Perhaps he’ll never get the answers he so desires, but at least his business is doing well. So, let us raise a glass to his success and say “Cheers” and “Hoozah” and all the rest of it!
